This week Kevin and Micah entertain the masses with an in-depth historical perspective on the war of 1812 as well as a complete retrospective on how Jane Austen pioneered the victorianfemcore genre. It's BYOMWE for bring your own mindless wikipedia edits as we attempt to classify, reclassify, and declassify six of the top pop singles in 'merica at the moment. Strap in and lube up, otherwise there might be some skin irritation involved.

Much like Mr. Darcy or Edward Cullen; We are sometimes rude and crass when we feel strongly about something. If you are easily offended by "common" speech please don't download our sparkling Victorian oratory.

56MB MP3: Post-Podcastcore

Track listing:

1. Eminem - Not Afraid

   • Kevin: 4 Britney Murphys from behind

   • Micah: 3 Mile

   • Final Score: 3.5

2. 3Oh!3 - My First Kiss

   • Micah: Three 1 Three

   • Kevin: 3 Medicinal marijuana dispensaries

   • Final Score: 2

3. B.o.b. Ft. Bruno Mars - Nothing on you

   • Kevin: 5 Boobs are better than 1 B.o.b.

   • Micah: 3 Starfoxes

   • Final Score: 4

4. Jason Derulo - In my head

   • Micah: 1 Focus Group Generated Artist

   • Kevin: 3 3rd Person Into Exclamations

   • Final Score: 2

5. Miley Cyrus - Can't be Tamed

   • Micah: 1 Year until she can withdraw that Hanna Montana money

   • Kevin: 2 Pedobear Pix

   • Final Score: 1.5

6. Adam Lambert - Whataya Want From Me

   • Kevin: 1 Adarod Lambeto

   • Micah: 4 Bottles of Guyliner

   • Final Score: 2.5

This weeks Winner: B.o.b. Ft Bruno Mars - Nothing on you

This weeks Loser: 3Oh!3 - My First Kiss(and the entire state of Colorado)

This week Micah and Kevin discover a new formula for Craptonium, a rare earth mineral until now only found in abundance in the billboard top 40. Bring your goggles and bunson burners and make sure you know where the nearest eye-wash station is, because it's time for some musical review chemistry!

The patented method we use for track deconstruction releases the following by-products into the atmosphere: Swearing, Insensitive speech, Vulgarity, Garish disregard of others feelings, Rakish good looks, The burning anger of 100 suns. If you are offended by words do not download this podcast.

54MB MP3: Electric Transmission Exploding!

Track listing:

1. Ke$ha - Your Love is My Drug

   • Micah: 4 Likable Hipster Beards

   • Kevin: 1 Manufactured Industry Whore... ...ible Singer

   • Final Score:2.5

2. Underworld Ft. High Contrast - Scribble

   • Micah: 9 Token 90s MTV DJs

   • Kevin: 8 Tabs of Extacy

   • Final Score: 8.5

3. Muse - Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever)

   • Kevin: 1 Pretentious Science Reference (Muse Fucking Sucks)

   • Micah: 2 Neutron Stars Colliding

   • Final Score: 1.5

4. Bombay Bicycle Club

   • Kevin: 7 Sweet Wheelies on a 10-Speed

   • Micah: 6 Indian Push-bike Theft-deterrents

   • Final Score: 6.5

5. Busta Rhymes Ft. Swizz Beatz - Stop the Party

   • Micah: 1 Fat Busta Rhymes

   • Kevin: 3 Slowly Sinking Hip-Hop Careers

   • Final Score: 2

6. Kanye West - Power

   • Kevin: 2 Unseemly Interruptions

   • Micah: 2 Car Crashes

   • Final Score: 2

This weeks Winner: Underworld

This weeks Loser: Muse (Go Fuck Yourselves)

This week K & M celebrate the musical bounty of leaked topless pictures stolen from celebrity phones. To commemorate this historic event we delve into our endless treasure trove of musical mediocrity to try to see if anyone left their talent unsecured and accessible to the public. Canada makes a comeback, and everyone finds their seats thanks to the well prepared staff, so sit back and enjoy another blind flight through the aural asteroid belt that is pop music.

"The Internet" is a scary place full of bad words and even worse attitudes, which is why we think people who are easily offended (or ever offended) should never download any of our podcasts.

60MB MP3: I'm Link

Track listing:

1. The Drums - Forever and Ever Amen

   • Micah: 5 Wampire Veekends

   • Kevin: 4 Terrible Indie Rock Haircuts

   • Final Score:4.5

2. Usher Ft. Will.I.Am - OMG

   • Kevin: 2 Golden Corral Hip Hop

   • Micah: 2 Tired Acronym Song Titles

   • Final Score: 2

3. Sleighbells – Tell 'Em

   • Micah: 6 One Miss Wonders

   • Kevin: 5 Bubbly Cans of Noise Pop

   • Final Score: 5.5

4. Arcade Fire - No Cars Go

   • Kevin: 4 Shrill Female Vocalists

   • Micah: 5 Disney Movie Intros

   • Final Score: 4.5

5. Ellie Goulding - Guns and Horses

   • Kevin: 6 Cutie Indie Rock Blondes

   • Micah: 5 Awkward British Hillary Duffs (7 for the Jezebel Remix)

   • Final Score: 5.5

6. Katy Perry Ft. Snoop Dogg - California Gurls

   • Micah: 2 Days Stuck in my Head :(

   • Kevin: 2 Massive Tittays

   • Final Score: 2

This weeks winner: Ellie Goulding for not having ugly tats.

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This week at least 1/3 of the bands reviews have a crushing addiction to denim and maple syrup. There’s some producers who have seen better days but still need checks in order to continue their bottle poppin’ habits, and a couple of bands that are, simply put, better off dead. Tune in to find out what exactly is wrong with music and what your options are for medical treatment from our trained staff of clinical rehabilitation specialist. This episode contains approximately 100% more ham disguised as bacon but thankfully is completely Nickleback free.

We are taking a week off so please leave comments/suggestions for us below.

As usual, the content/language/quality of our podcasts are extremely suspect and we cannot recommend that anyone listen to them, lest you enjoy being sonically sodomized. If the previous sentence offended you I suggest once again that you not listen to our show ever.

51MB MP3: Steve Perry

Track listing:

1. Crystal Castles - Celestica

   • Kevin: 6 Mexican Steve Perrys

   • Micah: 5 Canadian Composing Combos

   • Final Score: 5.5

2. Klaxons - Golden Skans

   • Kevin: 7 Excellent Covers of Grace

   • Micah: 4 Bad British Bands

   • Final Score: 5.5

3. Train - Hey, Soul Sister

   • Kevin: 1 Ukulele Punctured Liver

   • Micah: 1 Insufferably Inept Imbecile

   • Final Score: 1

4. Timbaland Ft. Justin Timberlake - Carry Out

   • Micah: 3 Past Prime Producers

   • Kevin: 2 JT Beatboxes

   • Final Score: 2.5

5. Roll Deep Ft. Jodie Connor - Real Good Time

   • Micah: 2 Wiley Wites Wubbish

   • Kevin: 2 Fat Kids Falling During DDR

   • Final Score: 2

6. Alexisonfire - The Northern

   • Micah: 4 Annoying Atheist Assholes

   • Kevin: 2 Dazzling Jesus Jean Jackets

   • Final Score: 3

This weeks winner: You, the listener. (Tie)